Talking to Your Kids About Suicide: Why Asking Can Help, Not Hurt
Many parents worry that talking about suicide could put the idea in their child's head. The truth is that asking directly can open the door to connection, relief, safety and support.
By Jennifer Rowe September 2026
Need help right now? If you or someone you know is struggling with thoughts of suicide, help is available 24/7. Contact the Suicide Crisis Helpline CALL 9-8-8 or
What if asking about suicide puts the idea in their head?
This is a fear many parents have—and it is completely understandable. The good news is that asking your child or teen about suicide does not increase their risk of suicide. In fact, asking directly when you are concerned can open an important conversation and connect a young person to support. For a child who is struggling, knowing that a parent is willing to talk about the difficult things can bring something incredibly important: relief.
“You can talk to me about anything. You don't have to carry this alone.”
Talking about suicide doesn't put the idea in their head
If your child is already experiencing emotional pain or thoughts of suicide, avoiding the subject doesn't make those feelings disappear. It may simply leave them feeling like they have to carry them alone.
Asking directly can send a very different message:
“I see you. I care about you. You can tell me what's really happening, and you won't be judged.”
That can create a sense of connection, safety and empowerment.
You don't have to have the perfect words. You don't have to be a mental health professional.
You just have to be willing to start the conversation.
How do I ask my child about suicide?
You can begin with what you've noticed:
“I've noticed you've seemed really down lately. How are you really doing?”
If you're concerned that your child may be thinking about suicide, it is okay to ask directly:
“Sometimes when people are hurting a lot, they think about suicide. Have you been thinking about suicide?”
Using the word suicide is okay. Being clear doesn't cause suicidal thoughts. It can actually make it easier for your child to understand that you are ready to have an honest conversation.
Then listen.
You don't need to immediately solve the problem. You don't need to have all the answers.
Sometimes the most helpful thing you can say is:
“Thank you for telling me.”
“You're not in trouble.”
“I'm really glad you told me.”
“We are going to get through this together.”
What if my child says yes?
Take a breath.
Hearing your child say they have thought about suicide can be frightening, but try to remember that they have just trusted you with something incredibly difficult.
Stay calm and listen without judgment.
Try to avoid responses such as:
“You have so much to live for.”
“Other people have it much worse.”
“You don't really mean that.”
“Think about what this would do to our family.”
Instead, ask gentle questions:
“Can you tell me more about what you've been feeling?”
“What has been making things feel so overwhelming?”
“What would help you feel safer right now?”
Your job isn't to fix everything in one conversation. Your job is to stay connected, take them seriously and help them access the right support.
If you believe your child is in immediate danger, do not leave them alone. Call 911 or go to the nearest emergency department.
You can also call or text 9-8-8, Canada's Suicide Crisis Helpline, for immediate crisis support. It is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and you can contact 9-8-8 if you're worried about someone else—not only if you are experiencing a crisis yourself.
What if they say no?
That's okay.
You can say:
“I'm glad I asked. And if that ever changes, you can always come to me. You won't be in trouble, and I'll listen.”
Keep the door open.
Continue checking in, especially if you notice changes in your child's mood, behaviour, relationships, sleep, school performance or usual activities.
You don't need to wait for a crisis to talk about mental health.
Small conversations build big connections.
Your child doesn't need a perfect parent. They need a safe one.
As parents, we can't protect our children from every painful experience.
We can't always know what is happening inside their minds.
But we can make sure they know they don't have to face difficult moments alone.
We can notice.
We can ask.
We can listen.
We can take their feelings seriously.
And we can help them find support when they need it.
Ask. Listen. Stay. Connect.
This Suicide Prevention Awareness Month, consider starting a conversation with your child—not because you think something is necessarily wrong, but because you want them to know that nothing is too difficult, embarrassing or frightening to talk about with you.
You might simply say:
“I love you. I'm here for you. You can talk to me about anything.”
And if you're worried, ask the direct question.
“Are you thinking about suicide?”
Asking won't put the idea in their head.
It may open a door they desperately need.
Canadian Resources for Parents & Youth
If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, call 911.
9-8-8 Suicide Crisis Helpline
Call or text 9-8-8 — available 24/7 across Canada.
9-8-8 provides crisis support to anyone experiencing thoughts of suicide or anyone worried about someone else.
Kids Help Phone
Call 1-800-668-6868Text CONNECT to 686868
Kids Help Phone provides free, confidential support to young people across Canada 24/7.
Canadian Mental Health Association (CMHA)
CMHA provides mental health information, resources and connections to local mental health services across Canada.
Government of Canada — Mental Health Resources
Find mental health and crisis resources by province and territory, including information for children, youth and families.
**A note for parents: Talking about suicide is an important first step, but it is not a substitute for professional support when a child is at risk. If you are concerned about your child's safety, reach out for help. You do not have to navigate this alone.
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